Daily Cartoon! TRANSFORMERS S.3,E.24: “Grimlock’s New Brain”

Welcome to Tuesday’s edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Today we have a special request sent in by listener of the podcast, Chris! He loves the show and so will you so make sure you listen to new episodes of The Car JoeMez Podcast every week on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep those subscriptions, reviews and referrals coming too. I love that shit.

Today, we’re checking out an episode of the original Transformers series! I assume everybody knows something about this show or franchise in some way, shape or form, so not a lot of background is needed here.

Chris asked me to review this specific episode for a reason I’m sure we’ll soon find out, but off the top of my head, I don’t singularly remember it. What I do know, however, is that this takes places after the animated movie so I’m guessing all the beloved robots we said goodbye to there are still dead. Either way, we’re going to find out today.

Since we’re all pretty familiar with the general premise of the show, let me give you some background on just my memories of this property. I would never have called it my favorite thing as a kid, but it was something I was totally into. I watched the cartoons, had a few of the toys and even saw the movie in theaters. My brother was a much bigger fan than me and it’s probably his number one “thing” from childhood. Either this or Ghostbusters. He loves them both. Take it up with him.

My favorite of the Transformers is and always was Starscream. He was the prototypical chicken-shit bad guy and I always loved his schemes behind Megatron’s back and then how he’d cower when Megatron would confront him. That’s entertainment, folks. He was very much like one of my other favorite cartoon characters ever, Cobra Commander, in that way except that he wasn’t the man in charge. Quick note for reference sake, both Starscream and Cobra Commander were voiced by the same actor, Chris Latta. I think that’s pretty cool.

 

Unfortunately for me, Starscream was killed during the movie in cold blood by the evil Galvatron just as he was taking the throne as leader of the Decepticons. Galvatron, of course, was a reincarnated version of Megatron and a general all-around douche. Fuck you, Galvatron.

OK, so this episode – based on title – will have an obvious focus on Grimlock and, I assume, the rest of the Dinobots which sounds like a score since they are usually hilarious. So this sounds like a great episode to check out.

Let’s watch a cartoon.

Transformers S., E.24: “Grimlock’s New Brain”

Originally Aired: November 14, 1986

Plot:

We open with Ultra Magnus talking about a new energy source they’ve discovered and for Grimlock to throw the switch. Of course, Grimlock fucks everything up and the rest of the Autobots are wishing the Dinobots had more sophisticated brains.

Other Autobots are beginning to malfunction because of some kind of leak in the power core at the center of Cybertron. Rodimus Prime, Ultra Magnus, Cup and Grimlock begin to travel to address the problem with the core and have a little gizmo that Perciptor made for them that will guide them. Grimlock wants to hold the compass-looking thing and, despite protests from Rodimus, takes it, breaks it and then leaves in a fit after becoming upset that the rest of the Autobots treat him like he’s stupid. Unfortunately for Grimlock, he’s really fucking stupid.

Rodimus sends Cup to stay with Grimlock because they don’t want the head Dinobot fucking with their security systems while underground. Rodimus and Ultra Magnus continue the journey.

Grimlock and Cup actually find the energy core on their own, but as they get close, the power incapacitates Cup. Grimlock knows that he has to shut the machine down so he goes about destroying it in typical Grimlock fashion. He tries ripping some of the wiring out with his teeth and is given a healthy dose of overwhelming power. When the machine is finally put to rest, Grimlock is suddenly the smartest guy around.

GrimlockManga

Grimlock’s voice is distinctly different and he’s suddenly describing the process of shutting down the machine like a regular ole Mr. Science. To Cup’s credit, he is completely dumbfounded by Grimlock’s new tone. Cup is a grizzled old robot-war vet so I don’t think he’s programmed to be able to handle a conversation with someone like the new Professor Grimlock.

Cut to Galvatron on his way high-tech Decepticon hideout, where he’s pissing and moaning about these two mutant-looking dudes he’s hired having failed at their mission. They planted some anti-electrons that were causing the Autobots to malfunction, but since the energy core was shut down, they’re now rendered ineffective. Galvatron demands an energy source to have his plan put back in motion and the one mutant who looks like Creature from the Black Lagoon, but with an eye patch says he should be able to use the energy from Unicron’s brain.

The Decepticons set course for Unicron’s floating head and are careful not to awake him just in case. They begin to drain him of the remainder of his anti-electrons. Grimlock has figured out the mystery of the anti-electrons and their debilitating effects and the Autobots make a mission to get to Unicron hopefully before the Decepticons can.

The Decepticons are ready for the Autobots arrival, though and shoot down their ship as they’re arriving. With the anti-electrons everywhere, the Autobots are rendered basically useless and are getting their asses handed to them on a platter. Apparently unaffected by the anti-electrons, Grimlock leaves the Autobots to get pummeled so he can use spare parts within Unicron to build a new Transformer, Nosecone. Nosecone transforms into a type of tank with a drill and Grimlock has him drill deep into Unicron so Grimlock can get safe passage to the brain.

Unicron awakens and his internal defense system activates against both Autobots and Decepticons! Grimlock, however, is a step ahead. In addition to Nosecone, he has now built an entire crew of additional Autobots that he titles the Technobots! The Technobots are able to disarm Unicron’s defenses and Grimlock sends them out to help the remaining Autobots while he stays behind in Unicron’s brain.

 

The Technobots are able to assemble and form Computron! Grimlock puts on a helmet and transfers his intelligence to Computron with the full understanding that he will revert to his original slow-witted self. Computron is able to fend off the Decepticons and save the day for the Autobots all while destroying the remaining supply of anti-electrons. Everything is good in Autobot land. For now.

 

Final Thoughts:

I can’t remember ever seeing this episode and I certainly don’t ever remember Computron, but this was fucking dynamite. Pretty much the regular premise for the show: Autobots seeking energy source, Decepticons sabotaging Autobots, fight, but it was fun and felt different.

Smart Grimlock is terrific when he’s being condescending to less intelligent Autobots. It’s like those motherfuckers had it coming for all the years of treating him like a moron.

All in all, a really cool episode that I’m happy was suggested. If you’re looking to get on this, I don’t believe Transformers is streaming anywhere right now. I literally had to order this DVD from Amazon because it was literally the one of the series that I never got around to owning previously. There’s also nothing really up on YouTube so DVD it is. Not that I’m mad about that. I still like owning hard copies of certain things and am happy it gave me an excuse to finally have all of the first-generation Transformers series.

Over the years, I’ve watched a bunch of this show, but thinking back, it was probably exclusively pre-movie. After seeing this, I’m super interested to check out the rest of seasons 3 and 4 and see how it finished off.

Thanks for reading. Keep the requests coming and we’ll see you tomorrow!

❤ Joe

 

Daily Cartoon! ANIMANIACS: S.1,E.24: “Opportunity Knox/Wings Take Heart”

After a much-needed weekend respite, welcome back to the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Remember to check out the latest episode of the show, The Car JoeMez Podcast on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Make sure to subscribe, like, rate, leave a review and share it with your friends.

I wanted to start the week off with something light and I remembered that Animaniacs was on Netflix and voila! I can’t admit to being a big fan of this show when I was a kid. I liked it, thought it was OK, but it was nothing I was ever too into. Also, by the time of its premiere (September 13, 1993 – which also happened to be my 12th birthday) I was already into the too-old for cartoons stage of life so only kept a passing interest in this.

I’ve since watched some episodes here and there since it was added to the streaming services and I have enjoyed the ones I’ve watched. There’s a lot of adult humor in there that I’m 100% positive I didn’t get or understand as a kid, but makes me do the “how the fuck did they sneak that one in there?!”

In addition, this show also introduced us to Pinky & The Brain who eventually got their own spinoff that – dare I say – was even better than the home base they emerged from. As a whole, Animaniacs lasted 99 episodes total combined from its runs on Fox and then, eventually, Kids WB and was pretty popular for its time. Not that it had a toy line that I can remember, but I know for a fact that it had a video game on Genesis and Super Nintendo. I even have the Genesis version!

genesis

See? I wasn’t lying. Hell, I’ve even got the Warners in Funko form too!

funko

So, yeah, I suppose I’ve grown to appreciate this show much more as I’ve gotten older and re-watched it here and there. One thing I did absolutely love as a kid, however was this:

I would say that’s enough background on this show. Let’s watch a cartoon.

Animaniacs: S.1, E.24: “Opportunity Knox/Wings Take Heart”

Originally Aired: October 18, 1993

We open with a quick infomercial where the Warner brothers and their sister, Dot, want to shave you bald for just $19.95. They demonstrate on that poor security guard that they’re always terrorizing around the Warner movie lot. Cute and quick and sends us into the opening theme which will get in your head like nobody’s business.

From there, we go into a Pinky and the Brain bit. Pinky wonders what Brain wants to do tonight and, of course, Brain informs him that they’ll try to do the same thing they do every night: try to take over the world.

Brain has invented a new strain of pollen that causes a temporary allergic fit in all humans and plans to use it to rob Fort Knox. How do they plan on even getting to Fort Knox? They’ll use one of the labs technological resources: the minivan.

Of course, just miles away from Fort Knox, the duo get pulled over, but are able to get out of it by telling the officer that once they control all of the world’s gold, their budget will result in substantial spending increases for law enforcement.

They arrive at Fort Knox, hit the security team with Brain’s allergy pollen and then go about lifting all the gold. There’s just one problem: gold bars are heavy AF and Pinky and the Brain are lab mice who are unable to move them. They end up dropping the first bar they lift on top of themselves and the next we see of them, are back in their cage at Acme Labs sporting slings and bandages where Brain promises a better plan for tomorrow night. Pinky asks what they’ll be doing then and Brain answers, “the same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world!”

We then segue into a quick “Good Idea, Bad Idea” segment that was used to buffer between stories. Good idea: stopping to smell the roses. Bad idea: stopping to feel the roses and puncturing yourself on thorns on the stem of said roses.

It’s on to our second story of the day, “Wings Take Heart”. A nondescript insect is taking a nap when he spots a beautiful butterfly girl and becomes immediately smitten. She spots him gawking at her in her mirror while she’s brushing her hair. They make eye contact and start flying all over town together.

OK, let me hit pause for a second. Folks, I can tell you from tons of experience that creepily staring at chicks from across the way never ends up with you flying all over town with them. Never. Sometimes they make and uggo face at you. Sometimes they turn around. Sometimes they flip you the bird or send their really big boyfriend over to you so he can ask what your problem is. At no point does it work out like this show has thus far. Just something to keep in mind next time you’re feeling like a creep at the bar.

Our unnamed insect is about to kiss his dream butterfly when he’s suddenly smashed by a passing tractor-trailer. And I’m not talking about former basketball great Robert “Tractor” Traylor either.

 

Our bug protagonist gets shuttled around from a number of different trucks that end up smashing him and taking him further and further away from where he needs to be when finally his little bug body has had all it can stand. He’s done. Laid out. A mama vulture picks him up to feed to her kids, but there’s a forest fire bearing down, so she packs up her hatchlings and takes off. Our beaten bug tries escaping, but he’s no match for the quick-moving fire.

Just when it looks as if all hope is lost, a helicopter does a massive water drop on the fire which washes it out and flows our little guy to temporary safety. He’s floating on a leaf and about to fall into a sewer drain when he sees his pretty butterfly girlfriend sitting under a rose crying. He calls to her, she perks up, he flies up and finally gets his kiss.

Now, I think it’s important to state that this is also ridiculous. Everybody knows that these hoes ain’t loyal. The second he was taken away, you know that butterfly chick was gonna be on Bug-Tinder or back in the bars getting a new thirsty-ass dude to give her some attention. She certainly ain’t going to be sitting under a rose waiting for this dude to just appear out of nowhere like an RKO again. This is just reality. This is how the world works. Plenty of other bugs all over.

Now with both of our stories for the day concluded, the Warners pull out the Wheel of Morality to tell us today’s learned lesson: “If you can’t say something nice, you’re probably at the Ice Capades”. Hahahahaahahahahahahhaahahahahahahhaha. Poor Ice Capades. I actually went once when I was a kid and the big thing was Super Mario Bros. I remember having a good time. But, for now, sick burn, Yakko.

Final Thoughts:

This show is great. There was a couple of swipes at Disney in there which, for the time, were probably scandalous, but they’re done tongue-in-cheek and are pretty funny. The show as a whole is a good time.

I don’t really get the whole bug story, but it just was what it was and the music overlayed did a really good job of conveying danger and emotions in the vein of the classic Looney Tunes cartoons.

The more of these shows that I watch, I become convinced that they’re just not meant to be binge-watched. An episode here or there, fine, but if I tried running three, four episodes in a row, I may hate myself.

But for one episode and 20 minutes today, this was fun and is probably something I could just put on with my sleep timer as I’m going to bed some nights.

I know for a fact there are DVD sets of this show available, but you can find all 99 episodes on Netflix as well if you’re looking to check it out which I think you should. Especially if it’s something you haven’t watched in a while. I think you’ll be able to appreciate a lot of the jokes and humor a lot better as a learned adult. Thumbs up.

See you tomorrow.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! ARCHER: S.5, E.1: “White Elephant”

Welcome back to the Friday edition of the Daily Cartoon! I apologize that this is coming already late in the day, but sometimes these things happen. Quick programming note: this feature will go from being daily to weekdays only. I appreciate everybody coming back day after day, but it’s quite the commitment and I have other irons in the fire to attend to as well. Of course, I will be plugging any and all of that here once those take off.

This isn’t ending, by any means. I love doing this and will continue to do so. I also may introduce a new wrinkle into things to have something a bit different coming up soon too. I just need to free up some time to do all the things I like.

OK, so happy Friday and all that jazz. Today we’re watching Archer which is something I decided to watch on my own. Truth be told, I know a few people who love this show, but I’ve never seen it. It’s always one of those shows that I want to start watching and I mean to, but then I get lazy and don’t want to put in the commitment to starting a new show when I can just watch Parks And Rec again and fall asleep to the sweet sounds of Andy Dwyer singing “Bye Bye Li’l Sebastian”.

The reason I picked this episode is pretty simple. Lately, all the shows I’ve been watching have had pretty short runs or were produced for syndication so there was never a chance to see what works and what doesn’t and to make adjustments to the show whether it be in characters or tone.

Archer not only adjusted, they changed the entire fucking show around. What was a spy program for the first four seasons apparently turned into Archer Vice for Season 5 and dealt with the characters selling blow. That’s a pretty big fucking adjustment, I’d say.

So I just wanted to see how they did it. Was it something they explained? Or did they just show up for the first episode of the season like, “Hey! We’re about drugs now!” I want to know these things.

That’s where we stand. And with all of that said, let’s watch a cartoon.

Archer: S.5, E.1: “White Elephant”

Originally Aired: January 13, 2014

Plot:

We’re greeted by Archer as he’s walking into ISIS headquarters with some beautiful music playing in the background. It’s a slow and deliberate intro with all the other characters making quick appearances until he arrives in his mother’s office and – SUHPRISE – there’s a huge explosion that take us into the opening credits and theme song.

 

When we return, there’s a massive shootout happening in the office. Bullets are whizzing by everywhere as Archer tries to figure out Beaker from The Muppets’ boss. After one of the opposing “storm ninjas” – as they’re called by Cheryl – gets shot, it is revealed that they’ve been battling FBI agents. Probably not the best idea.

 

The whole team is cuffed and taken in and Malory – Archer’s mom – tells everybody that she’ll take care of things, but nobody should say a word. As everybody is getting interrogated separately, they immediately all start giving up anything they can think of except for Archer and Lana who just get into a fight with each other to sucker in the FBI agents before knocking them out, freeing themselves and then heading out to free the rest of the team. They gather up everybody before crashing into the room to save Malory last who is putting the finishing touches on a deal that gives the entire crew immunity.

I’m really shortening things here, but what is said as they go back and forth from all the interrogation rooms is absolutely stupendous. This show is fucking something else. So Malory gets them all off the hook and the FBI won’t take any of the blame for having killed their co-worker, Brett Bunsen to which Archer lets out a huge celebratory yell because hearing that name reminded him that Beaker’s boss on The Muppets was Dr. Bunsen Honeydew.

The crew goes back to the ISIS offices to get whatever of their stuff is left and start pondering what they’ll do for jobs and money and health insurance. Cheryl is planning on being a big-time country singer. Archer says he’ll play professional lacrosse. Pam openly wonders about getting back into underground fighting. Lana tells everybody that none of that is possible.

At this point, Archer says they should discuss the elephant in the room and hits the switch to open the secret compartment behind Malory’s desk to display literally…not figuratively, but literally a ton of cocaine. The theorize that it’s probably worth between $50-60 million and Malory says starting a cartel shouldn’t be that hard since Mexicans are able to do it.

 

Archer then drifts off into a wonderful fantasy sequence about the entire crew running their cocaine cartel before snapping out of it and whispering, “Archer Vice”.

Final Thoughts:

I’ve summarized quite a bit here, but trust me, this was fucking stupendous. Like I suddenly want to binge watch this whole fucking season right now.

This was clever, witty, funny and whatever other glowing adjectives I can bestow upon this. I love that they just decided to completely change the direction of the show and the way they did it was wonderful.

I will definitely continue to watch me some Archer. I guess I should start from the beginning, but that sounds rather imposing since there’s already something like 6 seasons on Netflix. Oh well. I’ll just have to jump in and get started.

If you’re already a fan of this, I’m sure you’re excited to see my excitement. If you’ve never seen it or wondered if it’s something you should ever give a chance, go do it. Give it that chance and watch. I’m assuming the rest of the series is along the same tone as this episode and – if so – this show may become one of your new favorite shows. So get on the Netflix and start rolling through episodes.

Have a great weekend and I’ll see you on Monday.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! BUCKY O’HARE & THE TOAD WARS: E.5: “On The Blink”

Welcome to another exciting edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Today’s show is another special request from another podcast listener, Drunk Irish Jay. He likes the show and so will you so go subscribe to The Car JoeMez Podcast on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Like, leave a review and share with your friends.

Today’s show is Bucky O’Hare And The Toad Wars. I literally know nothing about this show besides a vague memory of toy commercials back in the day that had a kick ass theme song over them.

I never had toys, I never played the video game, I’ve never seen this cartoon. So this is a brand new experience for me. The show only lasted 13 episodes, but a quick Google search shows it’s definitely got its fair share of followers and fans.

buckytoys

That’s one of the cool things about checking out these shows and writing these things up: you learn. Sure, it’s all useless knowledge, but it’s fun to go back and see these things and see the fanbases and collections for them. So keep these suggestions and requests coming my way because I’m having a good time doing this.

OK, so back to Bucky. Basically, from what I gather, the plot of this show is about a humanoid bunny and his crew who are trying to stop a group of evil toads who are hellbent on universal domination. Easy enough. I think I can handle this. Let’s watch a cartoon.

Bucky O’Hare And The Toad Wars: E.5: “On The Blink”

Originally Aired: October 6, 1991

Plot:

So there’s a planet of koalas and a rogue bear is sending an SOS to Bucky O’Hare saying that their planet has been overtaken and turned into a resort/hotel for toads. Bucky immediately sets course for that planet.

In the meantime, we get some terrific scenes of the koalas serving toads at the resort; giving them massages, acting as caddies while they golf and feeding them while they sunbathe. This shit is great. I like these toads.

Bucky and Deadeye Duck head into the koala planet’s atmosphere, but can’t get through because of some kind of intense force field. Turns out it’s mammal-proof so neither Bucky nor his crew will be able to breakthrough.

Jenny – Bucky’s first mate who is a sort of fancy cat lady – calls Willy DuWitt – their human friend who acts as a sort of tech guru – on some kind of two-way mirror communicator. It’s like the one Dumbledore’s brother had when Harry was asking for help with getting into Hogwarts before the final battle with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Jenny begs Willy to transport to their ship, The Righteous Indignation, immediately as they need his expertise. Willy DuWitt is a young boy who looks to be all of 10 years-old. I don’t care how fucking smart he is, I’m not entrusting this little geek with the safety of the universe.

 

Willy shows up and quickly figures out that the force field is mammal-proof so he comes up with an idea to send the crew’s robot, Blinky, in because he won’t be blocked from entering the airspace. OK, that’s pretty smart, I suppose. Blinky does make it through to the koala planet, but is quickly found out and captured by Toad Borg who is one of the top-level baddies here. He’s a giant half-toad, half-robot thing, but is all evil.

They give Blinky some shock treatment and then leave, so Blinky frees himself and steals a hover-spacecraft belonging to the toads to head back to Bucky’s ship. Turns out that Toad Borg re-programmed Blinky when he had him captured and this was all just a clever ruse to have Blinky sabotage The Righteous Indignation. It looks like curtains for Bucky O’Hare and team as the ship hurdles toward the sun.

Willy DuWitt goes into crazy emergency science-mode and fixes Blinky. They send the robot back to the koala planet under the guise that he’s still reprogrammed and he deactivates the defense shield. Willy is able to fix the hyper-drive on the ship and they head to the koala planet to take care of business.

A short battle ensues and Bucky, Deadeye, Jenny, Willy and Blinky are trapped. But Bruiser – a brawler baboon – comes in and beats up a couple of toads and chases them off the planet so the koalas have their home back.

Final Thoughts:

I fucking love these toads. They have zero scruples. My kinda fellas.

I really want to check out the rest of this series after seeing this one episode now. I like the characters and I like shit happening in space so this definitely appeals to my interests.

I’m interested in what the back story for the crew is here. Are they the only good guys? Is there a whole fleet of good guys and this just happens in their section of the galaxy that they’re assigned to patrol? By any chance is Chinese Moon Supervisor from Independence Day 2 involved? God, I wish he was.

But, yeah, I want to see how these toads became such big heels and how this whole situation grew. So, obviously, I’m giving this a thumbs-up. There’s some episodes on YouTube, but I believe there’s also a DVD set of all 13 episodes. If you’re interested, go check that out and then report back to me with your thoughts.

See you tomorrow.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! JAMES BOND, JR: Ep. 9: “The Eiffel Missile”

Welcome back to another edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Remember to check out the weekly show, The Car JoeMez Podcast, on iTunesSoundcloudStitcher or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen to a couple of episodes, subscribe and leave a review because that stuff all helps and I’d appreciate it.

As for today’s cartoon, we’ll be watching an episode of James Bond, Jr. As the title implies, this show was basically a type of Flintstones Kids but with the nephews and kids of characters from the Bond universe.

The show had one 65 episode season produced for syndication that aired between 1991-1992. Personally, I remember it as a show that I’d watch while I was eating breakfast before my mom shuttled me off to school in the mornings. I don’t remember it really ever catching fire, but it may have been more popular than I remember because it had a toy line…

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…and a video game!

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I can’t say I ever had any of that stuff or even played the game, but I remember the show being OK enough for some early morning entertainment.

The basic premise that James Bond, Jr. (nephew of the actual James Bond) attends a prestigious school with classmates IQ (grandson of Q) and Gordo Leiter (son of Felix Leiter). The team up to battle the villainous group known as SCUM (Saboteurs and Criminals United in Mayhem).

 

If I were the bad guys, I’d totally use the abbreviation too. Someone just put way too much thought into that name. I wonder if there’s an episode where they just sit around brainstorming names. That’d fill 22 minutes, I’m sure.

So that’s the background on JBJ, so – with that said – let’s watch a cartoon.

James Bond, Jr.: Episode 9: “The Eiffel Missile”

First off, the intro to this show is pretty good. The song is really catchy and it’s the main thing I remember about this show 25 years after the fact. You’ll probably like it too.

We open at Heathrow Airport where James Bond, Jr. is returning to England after a trip abroad. As he’s coming through customs, he recognizes Skullcap, a SCUM agent causing a ruckus on another of the lines. JBJ goes after Skullcap who evades him and runs out of the airport and on the ramp where a plane is being loaded for takeoff. Skullcap hijacks the plane and Bond, Jr. requisitions a staircar to chase him.

Apparently, he’s taken the most powerful staircar ever built because he’s able to not only keep up with the airplane, but get in front of it right before Skullcap is able to takeoff. Bond boards the plane and – after a brief fight – grabs an envelope that Skullcap is trying to protect before hitting the ejector seat and leaving Skullcap to die in a fiery crash that we don’t see, but I’ll just assume happens.

Bond gets admonished by the headmaster of his academy for doing stupid, dangerous shit on school grounds and shit like that is why they’re cancelling the school trip to Paris. Supposedly, terrorists have smuggled a nuclear warhead into Paris and the school needs to protect their students. I guess we have our mystery for the day.

While James is getting a workout in, IQ, Gordo and other friends Tracy and Phoebe are watching him and discussing the nuclear weapon thing. Turns out that the envelope JBJ grabbed from Skullcap contained plans for such a nuclear weapon and Bond is fired up about wanting to go to Paris and foil this plot. As soon as he says that, Mr. Mitchell, the school’s athletic director comes in to have a casual chat with the group. He knows all of JBJ’s off-campus activities and gives him a tip as to when would be a good time to leave school grounds to head to Paris.

The crew take a hovercraft to Paris since JBJ is temporarily banned from the airport and are met by an undercover SCUM operative who clues in the big bads that Bond is on board. All of a sudden, Skullcap show up in a helicopter very undead despite his absolutely tragic and unseen demise in an awful, horrible , violent plane crash that I assume happened at the beginning of the episode and begins shooting at the hovercraft. Luckily, they turn the tables and force Skullcap into another crash landing that I’m sure will have finally killed him for good this time.

James goes on a dinner-date with a girl from the hovercraft ride who I thought was a SCUM agent, but turns out is the daughter of a French policeman. Their date is interrupted by Dr. Derange (one of the top guys in SCUM) and Skullcap, who is still not fucking dead, but JBJ and his lady friend, Marci take care of business and go searching for the warhead together.

 

Marci informs James that in addition to the streets of Paris, she also knows the sewers so the two head out through the underground toward the Eiffel Tower since James is certain that’s where they’ll find the warhead. They come upon the underground lair of Dr. Derange and find what they were looking for. Unfortunately, James and Marci are captured by Skullcap (still not dead) and the two are chained to the missile which is being geared up to be shot to Moscow.

James uses his trusty laser-watch to cut the chains and free him and Marci. He then rips out the navigation wiring from the side of the warhead which sends it into space instead of Moscow. James and Marci return to the lair looking to apprehend Dr. Derange, but he’s already gone and has sworn revenge for another day.

Final Thoughts:

I actually really enjoyed this! Got your typical cartoon cheesiness, but in a fun way and I really liked Dr. Derange. Apparently he’s one of the most active villains in this series and I would definitely watch more to see what else he’s got going on.

I killed off Skullcap three times without him actually dying once. My apologies to the Skullcap family.

The Bond crew is OK, but – in this episode, at least –  they didn’t get overexposed and I was thankful for that. Gordo, IQ and Tracy serve their purposes well enough, but the Phoebe girl is Tracy’s nerd BFF who has this over-spoken crush on JBJ and I’m sure it gets very annoying very easily.

If you want to check this out, there is a DVD set available, but YouTube isn’t that great. It’s got some episodes, but in very meh quality and broken up into parts which gets annoying. I may check out some more episodes if I get some time because I did have fun with it so feel free to do the same.

See you tomorrow.

❤ Joe

 

Daily Cartoon! MIGHTY MAX: E.8: “Norman’s Conquest”

Welcome to another edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Today we have another special request as this was sent in by Steve who listens to the podcast. You should listen too! Find it on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Remember to subscribe, like, comment and review because we love all that stuff.

Today’s show is Mighty Max. This is another show that I know in name only. I’ve heard of it, never seen it, never owned toys and never played the video games. So, I had to head to the handy-dandy internet to do some background research on this show before I just jump in blind.

Apparently, Max is just a kid who gets an Egyptian statue mysteriously sent to him one day. He drops the statue and it smashes revealing the cap that becomes his trademark. He is then introduced to Virgil and Norman who become his crew and they travel around the world defending Earth from Skullmaster and his minions.

 

OK, this sounds pretty fun and an easy-enough premise. The show ran for 40 episodes between 1993 and 1994 and seems to have a pretty loyal following. I’ll be honest, I’m kind of looking forward to checking this out after the little bit of research I did. Sounds like a good time.

So, with that said, let’s watch a cartoon!

Mighty Max: E.8: “Norman’s Conquest”

Originally Aired: October 27, 1993

Plot:

So the opening theme sequence shows Max, Virgil (some kind of wizened bird friend…you can tell because he wears glasses) and Norman (a kind of Viking bodyguard heavy) traveling through space and time via transportational portal as they fight the Skullmaster and his associates. OK, I get the basics. So far, so good.

 

We open in Boulder, Colorado where a couple of excavators have unearthed an old-looking axe that they’re going to send back to England to have cataloged. One of the explorers takes the items they’ve found and sets off while the other stays behind to continue digging in the ice and snow.

Suddenly, a giant monster erupts from under the thick ice. The remaining explorer begs for his life and is swatted away for his troubles. The monster screams for Norman.

We cut to Max in school, just about to take a test, but when he looks at his paper, he gets an urgent message with directions to a portal. Max fakes an illness to get out of the test and heads to the portal. He arrives in a junkyard where he’s met by Virgil and, also, the monster from Boulder – who is called Spike – who is tossing wrecked cars around like it’s nobody’s business.

Norman arrives on the scene and it’s immediately obvious that him and Spike have a history together. Just when it looks as if Spike is going to finish Norman, Max uses a giant magnet-crane to pull Spike away and drop him in a compactor. They assume he’s finished, but Spike emerges almost immediately and continues causing a ruckus as Max and friends decide to run.

The trio thinks they’ve gotten away from Spike and during a slow moment, Norman fills us in on his back story with Spike. Ten-thousand years ago, Spike’s clan invaded Norman’s town. Norman’s father is killed by Spike while Norman is just a boy and Norman blames himself for not being able to get his father his axe in time.

The three return to Norman’s home: Boulder, Colorado to retrieve the long-lost war-axe. Spike is already there waiting, but Norman has come to terms with having to eliminate Spike to eradicate the guilt of his father’s death. While Norman and Spike do battle, Max and Virgil find out from the remaining explorer who is still there that the axe has been discovered, but is now in England.

Virgil is able to open a quickie-portal so they can retrieve the axe in England and get it to Norman who could use the confidence boost that wielding his father’s axe would bring. The crew is able to get the axe from the English museum and get it to Norman who gets the Hulk-up boost from having the weapon.

Norman, in lieu of slicing up Spike, just knocks him off the side of a cliff where he is then buried by an avalanche. Norman then takes some alone time to pray to his father and return the axe to him spiritually.

Final Thoughts:

First impression, this show was a lot less exciting than I had imagined it being. A lot hinges on the ability for Virgil to read some scripture about where portals can be found, but when they needed a portal to retrieve the axe in England, it felt like they were able to drum one up without issue.

Also – and this is a continuity issue – when they do get the axe, they didn’t bring it back through the portal with them. They had some museum security guards to distract to give themselves the chance to escape, but they leave the axe behind once they do create the diversion. Just something that really bugged me while watching.

All in all, nothing of much depth here. I wasn’t very into the characters and the story was pretty weak. Spike never seemed like a major threat and it felt like it was just a matter of time before he was vanquished.

This may have just been a weak episode as a whole. It’s hard to judge a series by just one installment, but there wasn’t anything about this show that makes me feel like I need to sit down and watch the series from the beginning. It’s not something I’d never watch again, but nothing I’m in a hurry to watch more of either.

Apparently, there is a DVD set out there if you’re looking for more Mighty Max. Like I said earlier, it’s only a 40 episode series so it wouldn’t consume your life if you decided to binge.

Thanks for reading and I’ll see you tomorrow.

❤ Joe

 

Daily Cartoon! GARGOYLES: S.2,E.27: “Golem”

Welcome to the Monday edition of the Daily Cartoon. I’ve even impressed myself with how consistent I’ve been with this so far. Also, keep the suggestions and requests coming. I will get to all of them. Promise.

Before we get going, remember to check out the weekly show, The Car JoeMez Podcast on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. If you have the time to click like on all those episodes or leave a review on iTunes, that would be very much appreciated, so please do that.

Today’s episode was actually a special request by my brother, The Meat Man.

 

He’s big into the cartoons as well so he requested this right away when he saw what I was doing. Yes, that is his actual high school photo.

Today, we’re watching Gargoyles and I’ll be honest, I’ve never seen an episode of this. This came out in the mid-90s when I was already old enough to be too cool for cartoons so beyond just having never watched it, I literally know nothing about it.

When that happens, though, I just do some handy-dandy research in the ole Google and find out some stuff. What’s cool about this show, though, is that, the more I read, the more interested I was becoming in actually seeing this show. Outside of the actual premise, which – on paper – is whatever, it’s had some incredibly impressive write-ups such as being ranked 45th on IGN’s 2009 list of the Top 100 animated series.

The show ran for 78 episodes from 1994-1997 and received favorable comparisons to Batman: The Animated Series which is pretty big since that Batman series is fucking terrific. I know a lot of uber-Batman people and their Batman is The Animated Series.

This show became known for similar dark tones and complex story and character arcs that helped build the cult following it still enjoys today. It even received my favorite tie-in treatment: an officially licensed video game!

gargoyles_game_cover

The game, apparently, was your basic side-scroller and had zero relation to show canon, but who knows, I may still look for this now and try to pick it up. Buying up old games of shows and movies that I talk about on the podcast or write about here has become my new thing.

The basic story here is that the Gargoyles are stone by day, and protectors of Scotland by night, but one day they are betrayed by the humans that brought them into existence. Some are killed, the rest, cursed to stay forever in stone until the castle they’re force upon touches the sky or some shit like that.

A thousand years later, a NY billionaire buys their castle and has the Gargoyles moved to Manhattan where the curse breaks and they can begin protecting the people at night again. Supposedly, the writing leans heavily on MacBeth and A Mid-Summer Night’s Dream and, since I was that one kid in your high school English class that actually enjoyed reading Shakespeare, I already have a feeling I’m going to be into this and may need to buy DVDs so I can actually really watch it. We’ll see. Maybe I shouldn’t get too far ahead of myself.

Anyway, let’s watch a cartoon!

Gargoyles: S.2, E.27: “Golem”

Originally Aired: December 14, 1995

Plot:

The opening sequence gives us pretty good background on what the general plot of the show is. It’s appreciated.

Early on, I’m not really following everything that’s happening. There’s obviously a significant amount of continuity between episodes so I’m stuck trying to pick it all up. That’s not a bad thing. Hell, I prefer that in all actuality, it’s just that – for the format I’m currently doing – it can make things difficult.

So here’s what I’m currently following:

Goliath is the leader of the Gargoyles. He’s been dealing with a human man named Renard about possibly being able to get back home. I’ll assume the home he refers to is New York since I believe this episode takes place in Prague.

The Golem, which is a Jewish defender of old lore is about to be awoken for the first time in 400 years, but is stolen by a group of mercenaries hired by Renard. For what reason? I don’t yet know.

Just so we’re on the same page, I literally paused the episode about 12 minutes in just to try to recap a bit since I am trying to pay close attention and follow this. So far, I’m a fan of the animation and I totally get the comparisons to Batman: The Animated Series that I mentioned earlier.

OK, back at the ranch…

The Gargoyles and their NYPD friend Elisa Maza get a briefing on what the Golem is and the history behind it. Goliath immediately takes off to go find Renard because he has always known him to be a man of integrity.

 

When Goliath arrives at Renard’s a ceremony is about to begin. Renard is a frail, old man who is confined to a wheelchair and he has come upon an incantation that will transfer his soul into the body of the Golem allowing him to live again. These rich guys always seem to have a problem facing their mortality. Not like I blame them. If I were rich like that, why would I ever want to die? Hell, I don’t wanna die if I’m poor either.

But I digress…

Goliath is forced back by weaponry and Renard and his assistant complete the spell transferring Renard’s soul into the body of the Golem. Goliath tries to stop him, telling Renard to not choose this path, but Renard – now with the strength of the stone Golem – knocks him out before going on a walk around town to feel what it’s like to have mobility and freedom of motion again.

The Golem returns to the house it was stolen from with the purpose of destroying any book or spell that may contain a way to defeat it. Other gargoyles get tossed aside easily before Goliath is able to jump back into the fray and talk sense into his old friend, Renard.

The Golem/Renard back up with the “what have I done” realization and returns to have the spell reversed and deal with his future as it comes. The Golem is returned to the people who were trying to awake it in the first place so they can use it for its true purpose: defending the citizens of their town from these criminals who have taken too much control.

 

Renard offers Goliath transportation back to New York for all of the Gargoyles as a thank you for helping him save his soul, but Goliath turns him down because he says they have other business to attend to.

Final Thoughts:

Not something you can just jump into in the middle of like I tried doing here, but I definitely have some takeaways:

  • As already stated, I completely see where they get the comparisons to Batman, but it’s not like this is a carbon-copy. It comes from mood and coloring and works very well here
  • For not knowing basically anything about this show going in, I still liked it an awful lot. I have a genuine interest in tracking down this series and starting from the beginning.
  • The writing feels intelligent, but not like it’s trying to talk down to you. This is not just another paint-by-numbers cartoon. This is actually a quality program.

So those are some quick things I learned from watching this. Obviously, with everything I’ve been watching lately and am trying to watch as time rolls on, it will be hard for me to really give it the time it deserves, but it’s something I’ll definitely move to my list.

If you were a fan of this in the 90s, I totally get why. May be a little much for certain people because of the fantasy elements of it being gargoyles and I know some people just can’t deal with that, but it’s fun, it’s smart. If you’re like me and haven’t seen this before, do yourself a favor and check it out. You’ll be glad you did.

Thanks for reading.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! Super Mario Bros. Super Show: E.48: “Flatbush Koopa”

Welcome to the Sunday edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Came across this one on Netflix the other day and thought it would be fun to watch so BAM here it is.

Before we going, listen to the podcast, The Car JoeMez Show. New episodes available weekly on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen, subscribe to the show, leave us a review on iTunes or Stitcher of like and leave comments on Soundcloud. All of that helps.

Today we’ll be watching The Super Mario Bros. Super Show which debuted in 1989 and ran for 65 episodes. This was at peak Nintendo mania and if you put Mario on anything people would watch and buy it at that point. Seriously, there were some action figures of NES characters, of course, but they even had a fucking Nintendo cereal! Think I’m joking?

That shit was 100% real. And probably made a gazillion dollars.

Obviously, we were begging for more of our favorite Nintendo heroes, so eventually they gave us this show which – speaking strictly from memory – was a syndicated deal that would give you a different episode everyday after school. Fridays were special events as – in place of a Mario and Luigi adventure – you were treated to The Legend of Zelda and were walked through the trials and tribulations of Link. If I’m remembering that incorrectly, feel free to let me know, but these things take long enough to write as is.

My brother and I used to love the shit out of this show. We would even get our mom to buy us the commercial VHS videos because they were available in that Troll Books thing you would get at school. Remember that? Like every month, you’d get a circular, basically, of just books and then you’d beg your parents to buy everything for you?

trollbooks

You totally remember this. Don’t try to play coy with me, bro.

Anyway, they started putting Mario VHS tapes in this and we had a bunch. I think my brother may still have those actually. I should ask him. Not that I want them or anything, I just want to know if they still exist. They survived a lot of spring cleaning and donations over the years because they were in a little-used, low-traffic closet that we’d honestly forget we even had most of the time. Memories.

This series is on Netflix now and I just picked an episode with a short title so it didn’t clutter the header as much. That’s the kind of exact algorithm that goes into selecting the shows, folks. Let’s get to it.

The Super Mario Bros. Super Show: E.48: “Flatbush Koopa”

Originally Aired: November 23, 1989

Plot:

We start off with the sick rap intro that’s partially live-action with WWE Hall of Famer, Captain Lou Albano, in the role of Mario. In all honesty, if you’re not excited to watch this show after that, you may not have a soul.

The live-action portion begins with Mario and Luigi being awoken from their sleep as a neighbor is practicing their opera singing. They don’t know how they’re going to handle dealing with all this singing so while they think about it, we transition to the cartoon.

The cartoon begins with a parade in the Mushroom Kingdom because the Bros have finally defeated Koopa and sent him packing. Everybody is hyped and probably getting laid tonight. With this huge task taken care of, Mario and Luigi decided to get back to Brooklyn. Of course. They hope in the open drain and – BING – back in Brooklyn!

Unfortunately for them, as they take in the sights of their hometown, they see the Statue of Liberty, but the head has been replaced with that of Koopa! Turns out, leaving the Mushroom Kingdom was all a big ruse by Koopa to take over the Bros’ home. Koopa and the Koopa Troopers start changing all the signs in town to reflect some take on Koopa. Coney Island? Koopa Island. Brooklyn? Kooplyn.

Honestly, in 1989 Brooklyn could have used a refresher like this. I suppose I’d feel different had I lived there, but let’s call a spade a spade: fuck Brooklyn.

Back in the Mushroom Kingdom, Toad and the Princess are bored AF now that Koopa’s been run off so they decide to jump in the pipe and visit the Brooklyn Kingdom. And it’s not a moment too soon as Mario and Luigi are desperate for some help in beating off some Koopa Troopers. Princess says since the Bros. helped save her homeland, she’s going to do the same for them. What a woman. Ride or die.

They lure Koopa back into the Mushroom Kingdom by stealing his scepter that turns shit into bricks. So Brooklyn has been saved, but the battle for the Mushroom Kingdom will continue.

Back to live-action, Mario and Luigi are unclogging a toilet, but can’t even concentrate because Opera Lady is still having at it. So, Luigi tells us to watch scenes from the next The Legend of Zelda while they think of another plan to deal with her.

This episode looks fierce. Link’s a ghost and Zelda is a sassy broad who doesn’t like his shit. Link has a bit of a Corey Feldman vibe to him. I wouldn’t deal with his shit either.

Back in live-action, the Mario Bros. fight fire with fire and begin singing themselves until the neighbor finally agree to stop just to not have to hear them anymore. Hit the music because it’s time to do the Mario!

Final Thoughts:

If you’re not familiar, “Do The Mario” was the end credits song and dance you would do with Capt. Lou leading you through it. It was rad.

As far as the show, I’m going to say positive things! The live-action stuff is cheesy, sure, but it’s in small doses and serves its purpose. The actual cartoon was pretty OK too. If you’re not familiar with the Mario characters, that’s on you, but seeing them here was fun and despite a brief absence from the Mushroom Kingdom, the battle we all know and love continues.

This episode went by pretty quick for me and I had fun with it. Not everything needs to be Shakespeare. This was fine for what it was and I certainly see why I loved this as a kid.

Thumbs up.

Thanks for reading.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! Josie & The Pussycats: E.5: “Midas Mix-Up”

Welcome to another edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Many thank yous to everybody who has been coming by and checking these out as our web traffic here has been really good so it’s nice to know that there’s people sticking around to read these.

As always, remember to check out the weekly show, The Car JoeMez Podcast on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Even if you don’t listen, just stop by, leave a review, like a track. But you should listen. We have a good time and you will too.

Today’s cartoon is Josie And The Pussycats which was produced by Hanna-Barbera and had a run of 16 episodes before they repackaged the show as Josie And The Pussycats In Outer Space. Outer space will have to wait for another day, because today we’re focused on the original.

I really didn’t (and still don’t) know too much about this show other than it was a chick rock band and I think they solved crimes between gigs kind of like the Scooby-Doo crew. I don’t ever remember watching this as a kid, but I do recall little snaps of Josie and the Pussycats performing their song about themselves after – now that I think about it – episodes of Scooby Doo. If I’m wrong, feel free to correct me.

So, obviously, I did a little research about this show and found out that this came into existence because of the success my double main-man, Lou Scheimer, and his crew at Filmation had with The Archie Show. That was a huge hit and even led to some big record sales, so Hanna-Barbera wanted in on that. Josie was another property of Archie Comics so Hanna-Barbera snatched up the rights and tried to set the stage for a huge animation showdown. Or maybe not. They just really hoped it would be as successful as Archie and lead to good merchandising opportunities with music and such.

It’s probably safe to say that never happened, but it did inspire a live-action Josie movie released in 2001 that starred Rosario Dawson, Tara Reid and the uber-lovely Rachael Leigh Cook who I used to have a huge crush on. I’m sure she reads this blog so that will be embarrassing for me when she sees it. I’m actually a fan of the movie. I like it a lot. I own it on DVD. Shut up, it’s fun.

josie-and-the-pussycats

Let’s watch a cartoon.

Josie And The Pussycats: E.5: “Midas Mix-Up”

Originally Aired: October 10, 1970

Plot:

Let’s start with just introducing our cast of characters since even I’m unfamiliar with them.

Josie – The lead singer and guitar player. Romantically linked to Alan, their roadie

Valerie – Tambourine player and mechanical wizard

Melody – Drummer and airhead

Alan – Roadie and basically Fred from Scooby-Doo

Alexander – He’s kind of the manager/agent of the band also basically Shaggy from Scooby-Doo. He – like Shaggy – is voiced by Casey Kasem so they don’t even try to hide the resemblance.

Alexandra – Twin sister of Alexander, she is insanely jealous of Josie because she feels like she’s the real talent even though she’s not even in the band and she also wants to get down with Alan because, I suppose, chicks dig kerchiefs.

Sebastian – Alexandra’s cat who can be mean, but also helpful.

OK, so now that we know everybody, we open with the entire crew arriving to a ski lodge in a van. The Pussycats are going to be playing here, but will certainly have time to relax and get some skiing in.

There’s a golden castle shown on the top of the mountain and, inside, we’re introduced to Midas. He’s a horrible human being and is hellbent on making all of the world’s gold disappear with his super-spray he’s developed. Why he would want to do this is – as of this point – unclear.

The girls play a quick show on what appears to be a frozen pond and then goes skiing. Alexandra sabotages the crew because she wants to show up Josie and impress Alan and the entire team ends up crashing and landing on a cable-car that takes them to Midas’s castle. Even though they just made a mistake, Midas deals with them as intruders and describes his evil plan. They ask him what good making all the gold disappear will do him, which is a terrific question, and he states that the world will give him half of all they gold or else he’ll make it all disappear. Well…OK, then.

They get slammed in a prison where the floor is opening beneath them. Luckily, Sebastian the cat distracts the guards and frees them all. Look, what happens next is literally a Scooby episode with different characters. It’s not fun, it’s not creative.I mean, literally, you have two characters who are really just Fred and Shaggy under different names trying to save the day from a weird villain and his evil plans.

Hell, the Midas guy even refers to them as “those meddling kids”.

At some point, we get a ski chase to give us time to play a song in the background to hopefully sell some Josie records, but it’s just too long and too stupid.

Spoiler alert, they stop Midas and save the day.

Final Thoughts:

Look, I completely get what they’re going for here and I love the whole idea of a female rock ‘n roll group. But the execution of this is so piss-poor. It literally is just Scooby-Doo with small pieces of the band playing or having a song in the background to justify the whole “them being a band” thing.

I understand there’s a significant amount of time between the two, but this show needed to be more Jem & The Holograms. That show did a female music group right. With Josie, there’s just no depth to the story, characters or writing and it’s a complete issue of laziness to give you what amounts to Diet-Scooby. Garbage.

If you’re interested, I’m sure there’s a Hanna-Barbera Classics DVD collection of this somewhere out there. I, however, found a bunch of these episodes on YouTube in good quality. By all means, go check it out and if you disagree with my opinion, I’d love to hear why. Let’s talk it over. Otherwise, thanks for coming back today.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! Bobby’s World: S.3,E.10 “Baby Brother Blues”

Welcome to the Friday edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez. We’ll be sailing into the weekend with this one today, but, as always, remember to check out the weekly show, The Car JoeMez Podcast, on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever it is that you listen to the highest of quality podcasts.

I assume that nowadays, people think of Howie Mandel as the guy from Deal Or No Deal, but if you’re around my age, you know him for two things: always checking to make sure he’s not under your bed (I’m not explaining this. You either get it or you’re wack AF.) and Bobby’s World.

Bobby’s World was about the stories and imagination of 4 year-old (when the show first premiered) Bobby Generic and his dealings with the adults and siblings in his life. It originally debuted in 1990 and -shockingly, to me at least – lasted eight seasons. I remember it being a solid show that people liked, but nothing that took over the mainstream by any means. Like, yeah, I knew a bunch of people who watched it, but it was never the thing you couldn’t wait to talk about with your friends.

The show was created by Mandel and he even does the voices for both Bobby and his father, Howard. Supposedly, he’s spoken about the possibility of a revival for this show, but c’mon. There are plenty of things we need before getting new episodes of Bobby’s World. Just one man’s opinion. You don’t have to agree with it.

So, now that our background is out of the way, on with the show!

Bobby’s World: S.3, E.10: “Baby Brother Blues”

Originally Aired: November 14, 1992

Plot:

We open at the Generic house where Bobby is bothering his sister, Kelly, to shift through the mail to see if his Captain Squash (the primo superhero to all the kids) game has finally been delivered. The house is madness right now because Bobby’s mom, Martha, is primed to go into labor any minute and Howard – the pops – is nervous AF.

Bobby sees that his game was delivered, but it’s on the counter where he can’t reach and nobody will help him because they’re all catering to Martha who is obviously uncomfortable. The game gets tossed around a bit until it lands on top of the fridge. Bobby then goes into a fantasy segment where he’s a famous mountain climber trying to reach the peak of the frozen tundra where his hero, Captain Squash is trapped, frozen in a block of ice desperate to be rescued. It comes to an abrupt end, however, when Howard yells at Bobby for climbing on chairs, effectively breaking the fantasy. Bobby is already resenting the unborn baby because nobody wants to just give him his game so he’d shut the fuck up.

Bobby’s heated and decided to pack up and move so he doesn’t have to compete with the baby for affection. Where is he moving? To the French Foreign Legion, of course! Back to a fantasy sequence where Bobby is dressed like Napoleon and insults all the French soldiers because he hasn’t exactly mastered the language. He decides that the French are assholes, Lloyd, and runs to a waiting spaceship to take him to a different planet. When his brother Derek breaks the fan this time, Bobby decides to live in a blanket fort for his entire life.

Derek finally brings Bobby his Captain Squash game, but, of course, it’s fallen off the refrigerator and into a bowl of lentil soup and is broken. Bobby tries to get Howard to fix it, but once he’s again ignored, he smashes it on the floor. Howard gets fired up and tells him to go outside until he can behave himself.

Now, I don’t have kids, but if I did, I don’t know if sending them to sit outside like Dino from The Flintstones is quite the way to get a small child to realize the error of his ways. I don’t know! Maybe I’m completely wrong and you parents out there can tell me all about it. This just wouldn’t be my go-to punishment.

After a quick dream about going to a “Former Baby Brothers” support club, Bobby is rushed into the minivan because Martha’s going into labor and they need to get her to the hospital. After some time well spent in the waiting room, Howard emerges with the news that Martha’s had twin boys! Everybody’s excited except Bobby who doesn’t even want to go in the room to meet his new baby brothers. A nurse who resembles a black Betty Rubble says she’ll look after Bobby and takes him on a tour of the hospital that concludes with a visit to the nursery. Bobby sees his new brothers for the first time and just like Tazz, the mood changes.

He can’t wait to teach them everything he knows about being in the Generic family. We close up with Bobby being chased through the halls of the hospital by the entire family because he’s running around with the stroller carrying both newborns. What could possibly go wrong?

The show finishes with a scene of live-action Howie Mandel with his cartoon family in the hospital with an appearance by Paul Anka who sings “You’re Having My Baby”. What a moment.

Final Thoughts:

This show is fun. Nothing too serious, the characters are cartoony enough and the fantasy sequences for how a 4 year-old is interpreting his surroundings come off creative and imaginative.

I know I used to lose myself in fantasies like that all the time when I was a kid. I wonder is the same can be said for kids today, though. Sure, I don’t have them, but I have a shit ton of little cousins and whenever I see them, they’re all sitting quietly to themselves each holding a tablet or someone’s phone. They don’t even have interest in toys anymore and that kills me. Toys are the best.

More importantly, because kids don’t play with toys, it makes it more expensive for jerks like me since the toy companies have to make up those extra profits somewhere and I get hit with a bigger mark-up.

Yo. Fuck kids.

❤ Joe